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WHO'S ON FIRST?

The text of Abbott & Costello's classic routine.

Abbott: Well, Costello, I'm going to New York with you. Bucky Harris the Yankee's manager gave me a job as coach for as long as you're on the team.

Costello: Look Abbott, if you're the coach, you must know all the players.

Abbott: I certainly do.

Costello: Well you know I've never met the guys. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's playing on the team.

Abbott: Oh, I'll tell you their names, but you know it seems to me they give these ball players now-a-days very peculiar names.

Costello: You mean funny names?

Abbott: Strange names, pet names...like Dizzy Dean...

Costello: His brother Daffy

Abbott: Daffy Dean...

Costello: And their French cousin.

Abbott: French?

Costello: Goofe'

Abbott: Goofe' Dean. Well, let's see, we have on the bags, Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third...

Costello: That's what I want to find out.

Abbott: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third.

Costello: Are you the manager?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: You gonna be the coach too?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: And you don't know the fellows' names.

Abbott: Well I should.

Costello: Well then who's on first?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: I mean the fellow's name.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The guy on first.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The first baseman.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The guy playing...

Abbott: Who is on first!

Costello: I'm asking you who's on first.

Abbott: That's the man's name.

Costello: That's who's name?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: That's who?

Abbott: Yes. PAUSE

Costello: Look, you gotta first baseman?

Abbott: Certainly.

Costello: Who's playing first?

Abbott: That's right.

Costello: When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money?

Abbott: Every dollar of it.

Costello: All I'm trying to find out is the fellow's name on first base.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The guy that gets...

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: Who gets the money...

Abbott: He does, every dollar of it. Sometimes his wife comes down and collects it.

Costello: Who's wife?

Abbott: Yes. PAUSE

Abbott: What's wrong with that?

Costello: I wanna know is when you sign up the first baseman, how does he sign his name?

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The guy.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: How does he sign...

Abbott: That's how he signs it.

Costello: Who?

Abbott: Yes. PAUSE

Costello: All I'm trying to find out is what's the guys name on first base.

Abbott: No. What is on second base.

Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.

Abbott: Who's on first.

Costello: One base at a time!

Abbott: Well, don't change the players around.

Costello: I'm not changing nobody!

Abbott: Take it easy, buddy.

Costello: I'm only asking you, who's the guy on first base?

Abbott: That's right.

Costello: OK.

Abbott: Alright. PAUSE

Costello: What's the guy's name on first base?

Abbott: No. What is on second.

Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.

Abbott: Who's on first.

Costello: I don't know.

Abbott: He's on third, we're not talking about him.

Costello: Now how did I get on third base?

Abbott: Why you mentioned his name.

Costello: If I mentioned the third baseman's name, who did I say is playing third?

Abbott: No. Who's playing first.

Costello: What's on base?

Abbott: What's on second.

Costello: I don't know.

Abbott: He's on third.

Costello: There I go, back on third again! PAUSE

Costello: Would you just stay on third base and don't go off it.

Abbott: Alright, what do you want to know?

Costello: Now who's playing third base?

Abbott: Why do you insist on putting Who on third base?

Costello: What am I putting on third.

Abbott: No. What is on second.

Costello: You don't want who on second?

Abbott: Who is on first.

Costello: I don't know. Together: Third base! PAUSE

Costello: Look, you gotta outfield?

Abbott: Sure.

Costello: The left fielder's name?

Abbott: Why.

Costello: I just thought I'd ask you.

Abbott: Well, I just thought I'd tell ya.

Costello: Then tell me who's playing left field.

Abbott: Who's playing first.

Costello: I'm not...stay out of the infield!!! I want to know what's the guy's name in left field?

Abbott: No, What is on second.

Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.

Abbott: Who's on first!

Costello: I don't know. Together: Third base! PAUSE

Costello: The left fielder's name?

Abbott: Why.

Costello: Because!

Abbott: Oh, he's center field. PAUSE

Costello: Look, You gotta pitcher on this team?

Abbott: Sure.

Costello: The pitcher's name?

Abbott: Tomorrow.

Costello: You don't want to tell me today?

Abbott: I'm telling you now.

Costello: Then go ahead.

Abbott: Tomorrow!

Costello: What time?

Abbott: What time what?

Costello: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's pitching?

Abbott: Now listen. Who is not pitching.

Costello: I'll break you're arm if you say who's on first!!! I want to know what's the pitcher's name?

Abbott: What's on second.

Costello: I don't know. Together: Third base! PAUSE

Costello: Gotta a catcher?

Abbott: Certainly.

Costello: The catcher's name?

Abbott: Today.

Costello: Today, and tomorrow's pitching.

Abbott: Now you've got it.

Costello: All we got is a couple of days on the team. PAUSE

Costello: You know I'm a catcher too.

Abbott: So they tell me.

Costello: I get behind the plate to do some fancy catching, Tomorrow's pitching on my team and a heavy hitter gets up. Now the heavy hitter bunts the ball. When he bunts the ball, me, being a good catcher, I'm gonna throw the guy out at first. So I pick up the ball and throw it to who?

Abbott: Now that's the first thing you've said right.

Costello: I don't even know what I'm talking about! PAUSE

Abbott: That's all you have to do.

Costello: Is to throw the ball to first base.

Abbott: Yes!

Costello: Now who's got it?

Abbott: Naturally. PAUSE

Costello: Look, if I throw the ball to first base, somebody's gotta get it. Now who has it?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: Who?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: Naturally?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: So I pick up the ball and I throw it to Naturally.

Abbott: No you don't you throw the ball to Who.

Costello: Naturally.

Abbott: That's different.

Costello: That's what I said.

Abbott: you're not saying it...

Costello: I throw the ball to Naturally.

Abbott: You throw it to Who.

Costello: Naturally.

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: That's what I said!

Abbott: You ask me.

Costello: I throw the ball to who?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: Now you ask me.

Abbott: You throw the ball to Who?

Costello: Naturally.

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: Same as you! Same as YOU!!! I throw the ball to who. Whoever it is drops the ball and the guy runs to second. Who picks up the ball and throws it to What. What throws it to I Don't Know. I Don't Know throws it back to Tomorrow, Triple play. Another guy gets up and hits a long fly ball to Because. Why? I don't know! He's on third and I don't give a darn!

Abbott: What?

Costello: I said I don't give a darn!

Abbott: Oh, that's our shortstop.

Costello: (makes screaming sound)

Автор:	Мэй [ 08 июл 2008 09:26 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	трудности перевода
баян, наверное, но я только сегодня усылшала - how do you do, Joe - all right, Jack перевод: - как ты это делаешь, джо? - всегда правой, джек.

Автор:	Cels [ 09 июл 2008 01:49 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
Это мегабоян, Мэй. Мега.

Автор:	tragic-magic [ 10 июл 2008 19:51 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
Нет. Круче этого баяна Вам не найти, но все равно не могу удержаться и приведу его. Цитата: WHO'S ON FIRST? The text of Abbott & Costello's classic routine. Abbott: Well, Costello, I'm going to New York with you. Bucky Harris the Yankee's manager gave me a job as coach for as long as you're on the team. Costello: Look Abbott, if you're the coach, you must know all the players. Abbott: I certainly do. Costello: Well you know I've never met the guys. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's playing on the team. Abbott: Oh, I'll tell you their names, but you know it seems to me they give these ball players now-a-days very peculiar names. Costello: You mean funny names? Abbott: Strange names, pet names...like Dizzy Dean... Costello: His brother Daffy Abbott: Daffy Dean... Costello: And their French cousin. Abbott: French? Costello: Goofe' Abbott: Goofe' Dean. Well, let's see, we have on the bags, Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third... Costello: That's what I want to find out. Abbott: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third. Costello: Are you the manager? Abbott: Yes. Costello: You gonna be the coach too? Abbott: Yes. Costello: And you don't know the fellows' names. Abbott: Well I should. Costello: Well then who's on first? Abbott: Yes. Costello: I mean the fellow's name. Abbott: Who. Costello: The guy on first. Abbott: Who. Costello: The first baseman. Abbott: Who. Costello: The guy playing... Abbott: Who is on first! Costello: I'm asking you who's on first. Abbott: That's the man's name. Costello: That's who's name? Abbott: Yes. Costello: Well go ahead and tell me. Abbott: That's it. Costello: That's who? Abbott: Yes. PAUSE Costello: Look, you gotta first baseman? Abbott: Certainly. Costello: Who's playing first? Abbott: That's right. Costello: When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money? Abbott: Every dollar of it. Costello: All I'm trying to find out is the fellow's name on first base. Abbott: Who. Costello: The guy that gets... Abbott: That's it. Costello: Who gets the money... Abbott: He does, every dollar of it. Sometimes his wife comes down and collects it. Costello: Who's wife? Abbott: Yes. PAUSE Abbott: What's wrong with that? Costello: I wanna know is when you sign up the first baseman, how does he sign his name? Abbott: Who. Costello: The guy. Abbott: Who. Costello: How does he sign... Abbott: That's how he signs it. Costello: Who? Abbott: Yes. PAUSE Costello: All I'm trying to find out is what's the guys name on first base. Abbott: No. What is on second base. Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second. Abbott: Who's on first. Costello: One base at a time! Abbott: Well, don't change the players around. Costello: I'm not changing nobody! Abbott: Take it easy, buddy. Costello: I'm only asking you, who's the guy on first base? Abbott: That's right. Costello: OK. Abbott: Alright. PAUSE Costello: What's the guy's name on first base? Abbott: No. What is on second. Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second. Abbott: Who's on first. Costello: I don't know. Abbott: He's on third, we're not talking about him. Costello: Now how did I get on third base? Abbott: Why you mentioned his name. Costello: If I mentioned the third baseman's name, who did I say is playing third? Abbott: No. Who's playing first. Costello: What's on base? Abbott: What's on second. Costello: I don't know. Abbott: He's on third. Costello: There I go, back on third again! PAUSE Costello: Would you just stay on third base and don't go off it. Abbott: Alright, what do you want to know? Costello: Now who's playing third base? Abbott: Why do you insist on putting Who on third base? Costello: What am I putting on third. Abbott: No. What is on second. Costello: You don't want who on second? Abbott: Who is on first. Costello: I don't know. Together: Third base! PAUSE Costello: Look, you gotta outfield? Abbott: Sure. Costello: The left fielder's name? Abbott: Why. Costello: I just thought I'd ask you. Abbott: Well, I just thought I'd tell ya. Costello: Then tell me who's playing left field. Abbott: Who's playing first. Costello: I'm not...stay out of the infield!!! I want to know what's the guy's name in left field? Abbott: No, What is on second. Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second. Abbott: Who's on first! Costello: I don't know. Together: Third base! PAUSE Costello: The left fielder's name? Abbott: Why. Costello: Because! Abbott: Oh, he's center field. PAUSE Costello: Look, You gotta pitcher on this team? Abbott: Sure. Costello: The pitcher's name? Abbott: Tomorrow. Costello: You don't want to tell me today? Abbott: I'm telling you now. Costello: Then go ahead. Abbott: Tomorrow! Costello: What time? Abbott: What time what? Costello: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's pitching? Abbott: Now listen. Who is not pitching. Costello: I'll break you're arm if you say who's on first!!! I want to know what's the pitcher's name? Abbott: What's on second. Costello: I don't know. Together: Third base! PAUSE Costello: Gotta a catcher? Abbott: Certainly. Costello: The catcher's name? Abbott: Today. Costello: Today, and tomorrow's pitching. Abbott: Now you've got it. Costello: All we got is a couple of days on the team. PAUSE Costello: You know I'm a catcher too. Abbott: So they tell me. Costello: I get behind the plate to do some fancy catching, Tomorrow's pitching on my team and a heavy hitter gets up. Now the heavy hitter bunts the ball. When he bunts the ball, me, being a good catcher, I'm gonna throw the guy out at first. So I pick up the ball and throw it to who? Abbott: Now that's the first thing you've said right. Costello: I don't even know what I'm talking about! PAUSE Abbott: That's all you have to do. Costello: Is to throw the ball to first base. Abbott: Yes! Costello: Now who's got it? Abbott: Naturally. PAUSE Costello: Look, if I throw the ball to first base, somebody's gotta get it. Now who has it? Abbott: Naturally. Costello: Who? Abbott: Naturally. Costello: Naturally? Abbott: Naturally. Costello: So I pick up the ball and I throw it to Naturally. Abbott: No you don't you throw the ball to Who. Costello: Naturally. Abbott: That's different. Costello: That's what I said. Abbott: you're not saying it... Costello: I throw the ball to Naturally. Abbott: You throw it to Who. Costello: Naturally. Abbott: That's it. Costello: That's what I said! Abbott: You ask me. Costello: I throw the ball to who? Abbott: Naturally. Costello: Now you ask me. Abbott: You throw the ball to Who? Costello: Naturally. Abbott: That's it. Costello: Same as you! Same as YOU!!! I throw the ball to who. Whoever it is drops the ball and the guy runs to second. Who picks up the ball and throws it to What. What throws it to I Don't Know. I Don't Know throws it back to Tomorrow, Triple play. Another guy gets up and hits a long fly ball to Because. Why? I don't know! He's on third and I don't give a darn! Abbott: What? Costello: I said I don't give a darn! Abbott: Oh, that's our shortstop. Costello: (makes screaming sound)

Автор:	Verona [ 11 июл 2008 13:19 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
Вам смешно, а мне вот сегодня реальные документы принесли, где фонд под названием "Человек-Земля-Вселенная" на английском называет себя "Man-Ground-Installed"

Автор:	Abagnale [ 11 июл 2008 16:08 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
Rainman?

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трудности перевода http://www.lawfirm.ru/forum/viewtopic.php?f=17&t=577217	Страница 1 из 2

Автор:	tragic-magic [ 11 июл 2008 16:23 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
Bet u right

Автор:	Eshu Da Capa Preta [ 11 июл 2008 16:59 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
Verona писал(а): Вам смешно, а мне вот сегодня реальные документы принесли, где фонд под названием "Человек-Земля-Вселенная" на английском называет себя "Man-Ground-Installed" упал

Автор:	tragic-magic [ 11 июл 2008 21:28 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
Созерцание данного опуса непроизвольно вызывает в памяти моррисоновское: «His brain is squirmin’ like a toad… »

Автор:	Folko_Brandy [ 14 июл 2008 09:51 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
В продолжение трудностей перевода и наличия большого количества омонимов в английском языке... Переводил текст на тему акций на предъявителя и т.п., когда дошел до термина 'share certificate', решил уточнения ради заглянуть в Мультитран. Помимо таких значений, как "сертификат на акцию", "именное свидетельство на акцию", "сертификат акции", словарь выдал также значение "любимая проститутка сутенера". Был большой соблазн вставить в текст перевода именно это значение

Автор:	Nesevernyi [ 14 июл 2008 09:55 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
tragic-magic писал(а): Созерцание данного опуса непроизвольно вызывает в памяти моррисоновское: «His brain is squirmin’ like a toad… » Riders on the storm?

Автор:	tragic-magic [ 14 июл 2008 11:14 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
Угу.

Автор:	Ахурамазда [ 14 июл 2008 13:26 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
а такую читали? хохмочка не нова, но всё же... Цитата: Conversation between George W.Bush and his National Security Advisor. George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening? Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China. George: Great. Lay it on me. Condi: Hu is the new leader of China. George: That's what I want to know. Condi: That's what I'm telling you. George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China? Condi: Yes. George: I mean the fellow's name. Condi: Hu. George: The guy in China. Condi: Hu. George: The new leader of China. Condi: Hu. George: The Chinaman! Condi: Hu is leading China. George: Now whaddya' asking me for? Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China. George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China? Condi: That's the man's name. George: That's who's name? Condi: Yes. George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China? Condi: Yes, sir. George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East. Condi: That's correct. George: Then who is in China? Condi: Yes, sir. George: Yassir is in China? Condi: No, sir. George: Then who is? Condi: Yes, sir. George: Yassir? Condi: No, sir. George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone. Condi: Kofi? George: No, thanks. Condi: You want Kofi? George: No. Condi: You don't want Kofi. George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N. Condi: Yes, sir. George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N. Condi: Kofi? George: Milk! Will you please make the call? Condi: And call who? George: Who is the guy at the U.N? Condi: Hu is the guy in China. George: Will you stay out of China?! Condi: Yes, sir. George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N. Condi: Kofi. George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone. (Condi picks up the phone.) Condi: Rice, here. George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?

Автор:	Ахурамазда [ 14 июл 2008 13:29 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
и этого, вроде, тоже здесь не видел Цитата: ...весь рунет несколько лет назад обошла история, как фраза аудитора «большой четверки»: «We have already seen your balance sheet» была переведена клиенту смущенным ассистентом как «Видели мы ваш баланс... Так себе баланс...».

Автор:	Мэй [ 17 июл 2008 09:37 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
название американского телесериала Dirty Sexy Money первый канал перевел как "грязные мокрые деньги" http://www.afisha.ru/telecast/14661/ почему мокрые-то?))))

Автор:	EM [ 17 июл 2008 17:53 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
Интересно, какая из шуток была написана раньше who/hu или Авас (у Райкина в диалоге Карцева с Ильченко)?

Автор:	СтрелаКом [ 23 июл 2008 16:09 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
а еще в каком-то дервнем комедийном фильме был примерный диалог двух мигрантов приехваших в США. Примерно как это можно написать: How watch? It's six okloch. Such much?

Автор:	IE [ 24 июл 2008 09:53 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
СтрелаКом писал(а): а еще в каком-то дервнем комедийном фильме был примерный диалог двух мигрантов приехваших в США. Примерно как это можно написать: How watch? It's six okloch. Such much? ты чооо! это ж боян про мгимо ))))) 1. - How much watch? 2. - Six watch 1. - Such much?! 2. - To whom how 1. - MGIMO finish? 2. - Ask!

Автор:	_V_ [ 24 июл 2008 12:39 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
не надоело? Это изначально из "Касабланки". МГИМО же приплели сами мгимовцы лет через 20 после того

Автор:	СтрелаКом [ 24 июл 2008 12:41 ]
Заголовок сообщения:	Re: трудности перевода
IE писал(а): СтрелаКом писал(а): а еще в каком-то дервнем комедийном фильме был примерный диалог двух мигрантов приехваших в США. Примерно как это можно написать: How watch? It's six okloch. Such much? ты чооо! это ж боян про мгимо ))))) 1. - How much watch? 2. - Six watch 1. - Such much?! 2. - To whom how 1. - MGIMO finish? 2. - Ask! ваще-то это классика синематографа содранная и интерпретированная про мгимо. лохматых годов.

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